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It is absolutely paralyzing to learn that your child has substance abuse issues. Where do you turn for help? How do you know what steps to take? What is addiction, anyway? There are endless questions and no consolidation source of answers or support. In addition, the stigma of having an addicted child causes many parents to retract and withdraw rather than seek help. In truth, many families struggle with substance abuse issues, and the support, wisdom and guidance they need are not easily found.Parent Pathway was created for parents, by parents, to provide a place to find peace of mind at a time when their world feels like it is falling apart.

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  • Are you ready to recover from your child’s addiction or alcoholism?

    mirror on the wallSo often, we ask ourselves, “When will they figure it out?  When will they quit destroying their lives (and ours)?”

    Here’s the real question:  “When will we  stop letting them destroy our lives?”

    We didn’t cause their chemical dependency.  We can’t control it. We cannot cure it.  I consider those three basic facts of addiction and alcoholism, and they have come to dictate the way I now approach recovery—MY recovery. If I didn’t cause my child’s chemical dependency, then why did I keep blaming myself?  Why did I feel guilty for his choices and behavior, for the genes he inherited?  If I cannot control his behavior, then why did I insert myself into his life in a meddling and pointless way (e.g., calling his employer when HE lost HIS job.  Paying his legal bills when HE broke the law.) If I cannot cure his chemical dependency, then why was I more committed to his recovery than he was?  Why did I obsess about his alcohol and drug use when it had absolutely no impact whatsoever on his behavior? My worrying and stalking was truly a sorry testament to my addiction to his addiction.  I became emotionally and psychologically intertwined with his disease, a strangling co-dependency.

    Mirror, mirror, on the wall…I’m also sick, after all.

    Once I came to that painful and stark realization, we both had a shot at recovery.

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  • How Sweet Home – Feeling the Joy of a Loved one in Recovery from Addiction

    One of the joys of my daughter’s recovery is that she can be with us at home. This is a big deal because when she was active in her addiction not only could she not stay at our house overnight but she was not welcome to come over at all. It was part of the vigilance that we needed to keep in order to hold her accountable and set boundaries of what was acceptable life style in our home. Now that she is in recovery we can have holidays and time together as a family, a whole family. This was something that I took for granted before we entered into this challenging situation.

    At a recent gathering, we were in the kitchen where families always seem to congregate. We were celebrating some birthdays and having a large gathering. It is always fun with the kids running around and dogs barking and general ruckus going on. These are the moments that I’ve learned to just sit with and know that life is moving forward. I’ve learned that while I know things can always change, for this moment they are good and I can enjoy it. It was a sweet moment when during the midst of the family congregating some comment was made about how great it was to have my daughter home and she said, ‘I sure am glad all that is behind me…’ with a smile and a dip of her chip in the salsa. My husband gave her a hug and said with a big smile, ‘So are we…!’ I’m not sure she knows the magnitude of how sweet that moment was, but for me, it was a feeling that just for today, I will let the joy of this feeling wash over me.

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  • Sunday Inspiration for Parents of Addicts and Alcoholics

    Recognizing addiction in loved one Dr. Jantz“Tears are words the mouth can’t say nor can the heart bear.”
    - Joshua Wisenbaker

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