A while back, I caught Dr. Daniel Amen on TV talking about his book, Magnificent Mind at Any Age. I am interested in his work, especially since I discovered that the nutritional supplements he recommends seem to help with depression. When my son was first struggling to become sober, he carried his vitamins and nutrients everywhere with him in a shoe box. They kept him on an even keel and took the edge off, much as opiates had done.
Dr. Amen claims that SPEC brain scans reveal that people who think happy thoughts show much “healthier” brain activity than those who think sad thoughts. I didn’t catch his definition of healthy brain activity, but no matter: the point is that you improve your brain function when you are optimistic and positive, rather than negative. That sounds quite Disneyesque and is a tall order for the mother of a teen drug addict, but what have you got to lose?
This approach also dovetails well with that handy Al-Anon slogan, “Fake it till you make it,” which helped me get through many difficult hours. During my son’s active addiction, I awoke most mornings riddled with anxiety. Anticipating some sort of crisis, I greeted each day with a fight or flight state, ready to leap into action and deal with the missing son or the car accident or the threatening phone call. It took a lot of mental muscle-building (and a good therapist) for me to learn to talk myself off the ledge. Now when I am stressed, I flip the switch and reach for Smiley Faces instead of the Grim Reaper, faith instead of fear. That very conscious and deliberate action helps me feel calmer and—yes—happier.
Trust me, I am very much a work in progress. I was born in a state of High Alert, but as I learn how my brain works, I am equipping myself with some powerful tools to reclaim my serenity.